mahal ko sya
pero ewan ko lang
baka hindi ko sya mahal
baka gusto ko lang syang kausap
kasi masaya syang kausap
nakakatuwa
para bang walang problema sa mundo
parang parating puno ang wallet ko
parang di ako nilalagnat pag gabi
parang matataas ang grades ko
parang malaki ang sweldo ko
parang ewan ko ba
mahal ko yata sya
o baka naman hindi ko sya mahal
siguro gusto ko lang syang kasama
masaya kasi syang kasama
para kong lumilipad
parang kaya kong lutasin lahat ng problema
parang mabubuhay na ko kahit titigan ko lang sya
parang di ko na kailangang kumain
matulog, huminga...
siguro nga mahal ko sya
pero.. paano kung hindi ko pala sya mahal?
gusto ko lang siguro syang yakapin
masarap kasi syang yakapin,
tumatalon ang puso ko
nalilimutan kong wala pa kong hapunan
at na marami pa kong utang
o na galit na ang boss ko dahil parati akong late
dahil di ako makatulog kakaisip sa kanya
kakaisip kung nasaan sya
kung kumusta na sya
kumain na kaya sya? may iba kaya syang kayakap?
sino kaya katabi nya?
tulog na ba sya? o baka naman may tinatrabaho pa..
ewan, mahal ko nga ba sya?
hindi ko naman yata sya mahal.
gusto ko lang syang katabing matulog
masarap kasi syang katabi matulog
meron akong tandayan at kayakap,
at parang mabibilang ko lahat ng bituwin sa langit
kahit may bubong ang bahay namin,
nararamdaman kong ligtas ako
yun bang hindi ako tatamaan ng ligaw na bala
pag bagong taon, o ng kidlat pag umuulan
naiisip ko rin na parang swerte ako
yun bang nanalo ng isang daang milyon sa lotto
o ng bagong t.v. sa raffle sa christmas party
mahal ko nga sya!
hindi, hindi totoong mahal ko sya
gusto ko lang na nasa mabuti sya
na masaya sya kahit iba ang kasama nya
na ok lang sa kin na di nya ko mahalin
na ayaw nya kong kausap, kasama,
kayakap, katabing matulog
hindi!
hindi ko sya mahal.,
gusto ko lang ligtas sya
at hindi pinapaiyak ng kung sino sino
gusto ko mahalin sya nung minamahal nya
at na sana lumigaya sya kahit kapiling ng iba
hindi ko naman sya mahal di ba?
handa lang akong ialay ang buhay ko sa kanya
yung pag sinabi nyang talon sa tulay,
tatalon ako talaga,
at kung sabihin nyang ayaw na nya kong makita
at may iba na syang mahal,
kaya kong yumuko, lumayo
lumakad ng dahan dahan at wag lumingon
kasi nga mahal ko sya,
ano ba! ang kulit ko naman
kasi nga di ko sya mahal
hindi ko sya mahal
hindi nga..

07.30.2003.04.48.p.m. 

***07.30.2022.04.16.a.m***

it’s been a lifetime ago since I wrote this post and I still keep receiving notifications from people who wants to use it for their monologue, feel free to use with attributions and post links to your pieces if you have any, thank you! 

Maraming salamat po!

ok, so let me tell you about siargao.. i have no more time these days to write things down so this entry is a bit delayed,

the boat for surigao left at 8pm friday night, there was a slight drizzle, but the trip was otherwise smooth. the boat docked at surigao port by 4:30a.m. and i proceeded to the hotel to take a shower and charge my soon to be useless mobile phone. the trip to dapa was 3 hours by boat, and by the time we reached the resort, i was exhausted and all i wanted to do was sleep.

but sleep was the last thing on the itenerary, we went island hopping, visited the mangroves, the surf, the yacht building, the sand rifts, we rented bikes and got sunburned, we went swimming at a private island in the middle of the sea.. in between, my glass overflowed of red wine and somebody stole my mule!

i was supposed to be back by monday but there were no boats going back to cebu, so i was reluctantly (yipee!) stranded in surigao. you can actually tour the whole city by tricycle, i went to their airport, which only accomodates 8 seater planes, and their bus station which can take me to the other parts of mindanao.

by tuesday morning i was back to work, sporting a sunburn.. now that's what i get for not wearing sunscreen =)