the future is bleak

Two years ago I got a heart torn in two, with the intent of giving the other half to someone who wanted to share it with me. I wore it for a month or so till my skin erupted and my body rejected the idea of ever parting with half of my treasure. Last Saturday while Yuck and I were moving things and cleaning up the new flat, I found my rusty heart and decided to use it again. I drowned it in a strong chemical that wiped away all the blackness, it now looks good as new, but it's still broken, after all, that's how it always was to begin with.

Tonight, the rain is pouring hard and I'm looking forward to walking home drenched and soaked in heaven's tears. Why can't time just stop for a while and take me back to that happy place? The windows at my new room doesn't have a view of the sky, I can't seem to hear the laughter of the stars from where I stand, are they still there?

Maybe I should take the Osaka route soon to get away from all this sadness..