friday night lights

went away tonight, to somewhere i've never been to, to a place where i can step out and breathe the cold air till it rips my lungs apart. looked up to a star filled sky and listened to the sound of water breaking the rocks. i almost felt alive again, almost. yet it was empty, the darkness was vast and i could drown in it if i wanted to, i could get lost like so many others are lost everyday. but what's the point really? when the line between sanity and madness is so thin that you can cross over with the snap of a finger if you wanted to, everything becomes so fleeting and volatile and scary. why do we hang on when it's so much easier to trip and go overboard and be crazy..

this is one of those days when i just want to hop into a car and drive as far as possible from the toxic waste that is also known as the people around me. i need to find meanings, i've lost the motivation to wake up. i'm afraid that if somebody touches me, i will dissolve into molecules.